Retiring from Running

Yes, the rumors are true.

I often become retrospective at this time of year... maybe even a bit unstable.  It's dark out more than light, so no need for the shades.  It's cold, and I have to wear something more than shorts and a Hawaiian shirt on my runs.  There are no big adventures or lofty race goals staring me in the face, so I succumb to the temptation of food, drink and merriment of a non-running kind.  Anyway, it's rainy, so it would harm my reputation if I were to go out for a run.

Given that I recently had a birthday, I have decided to make some changes. After much contemplation and, quite frankly, some tears, it is time do some cleaning of house, as it were. 

I am going to retire my beloved gray 1997 Knee Knacker sweatshirt and not one, but 2 pair of Montrail trail shoes.

Yeh sure, I can hear you:  "Holy crap, Jackson, 'you still wearing that stuff?"

Well, yes I am!   I am loyal to these somewhat tired articles of apparel.  We have history.

I find casting-off gear is hard to do.  It's so insensitive.   Like the proverbial loyal dog the farmer has to take out behind the barn and shoot when it is old and sick.  However, I feel the time is at hand.

How do I know it really is time?  The neighbors already cast sidelong glances at me when I wear the sweatshirt around the yard.  "Dude must be having a bad year on the markets", or "Lookout, honey, that guy looks like he just crawled out from under a bridge." 

On one of the shoes, half the tread is gone, the uppers are delaminating and I cut the barrel locks off, so they don't tighten-up anymore.  The others were shredded by sharp rocks during the Bagger Challenge to the point where they are barely recognizable as shoes.

No, this stuff is beyond donating to the Sally Ann or the Burmese National Marathon team  (more on that another day, but I did send a container of shoes to them a few years ago...)  I can't use the stuff anymore when working in the backyard.  I can't make flowerpots out of my shoes.   I can't use my sweatshirt for a rag 'cause it's been a rag for at least 5 years.   

What do you think would be a dignified end for this stuff?

Unless a petition with at least 1,000 signatures and a fitting new role is identified by Wednesday, I will say a final, "Goodbye!" and pitch it into the dumpster.